Friday, April 9, 2010

2 years

I had a good day yesterday...despite the knowledge that I'll be in Florida on April 11. Just two years ago on April 14th I proclaimed the end to Florida - other then for the investigation of Jim's murder and hopefully a trial one day, I was through....wasn't coming back! Well that lasted briefly - my dislike still strong and fully grounded, I must 'face the music' and go to Florida for other reasons. It is a warm place - tropical and pretty, full of friends and family, sunshine and people who do care. I found more people who care yesterday. They care that Jim had life and was a contributor to this world. That makes me feel good.

Jim is missed every moment of every day. I get sad easily and I cry often. I pray for understanding and probably will never really understand. I struggle with that. I pray for answers and slowly...very slowly 'tidbits' (as I call them), are delivered.

I dreamt of Jim again last night. I was in a room that resembled a hotel lobby. I thought I saw him at the desk and ran to see him...the man turned, it was not Jim. I walked outside, still searching, and there he was. He was sitting in a chair and we both burst into to tears. We sobbed and held each other. I then woke up. I felt as if we had cried over his death. I don't know the meaning of the dream, but I know how much I love that young man and how much I miss him.

Please pray for answers to Jim's murder. It's been two years, it's time to know.

Love, Joanne (Jim's MOM)

3 comments:

  1. I still check here frequently, Joanne, hoping one day there will be news on the investigation and also to see how you're doing. I wish you peace and justice, and lots more good dreams of Jim.

    Francie Freese

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  2. I burst into tears when I received your text a little while ago. I was with friends. They asked me what was going on. All I had to do was say Jim's name. They know the story and have seen his picture, etc. They all believe in the power of prayer. I felt so blessed to be with them at that moment. It is hard to find friends such as them these days. I, as you all, DO NOT understand why things happen the way they do. One day we will have the answers. PLEASE know I am here for all of you 24/7/365! I love the three J's! I think of Jim OFTEN and pray for justice. Smile for JIM and know he is watching out for you!
    TONS of LOVE,
    Cousin Tami

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  3. Thank you both, Tami and Francie. It is your support and love that helps us each day. Joanne

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